Greetings from sling-land! It has officially been about a week since my surgery, and this is a much-requested update on how it went, how I am, and other various questions I’ve been asked lately!

The Surgery: June 22

Late Wednesday morning I dragged myself out of bed and threw on baggy clothes to go to the hospital. My parents had gotten stuck in traffic so the plans got switched around and I ended up beating them there and checking in before panicking in the waiting room for my name to be called. **Enter my transformation from average girl to popular girl.** Oh, is that not how it works in the movies? My bad. Well, after a hospital gown, a hairnet/shower cap hybrid, and an intense battle between compression tights and my calves (those things are NOT meant for people with muscle down there) I was chilling in the surgery center being a clammy-handed dweeb as per usual. On the plus side, I made everyone laugh, which I always consider a success. I said bye to my parents, spoke to all my nurses, and was wheeled in at 1 pm to start surgery.

Four and a half hours later and I was done! After the surgery I remember being too tired to keep my eyes open and not knowing how I was in my original clothes…must have been magic. I almost threw up during the wheelchair bit but thanks to zero food and liquids I managed to survive and get in the car and go to my parent’s house to rest. Success!

Post-Surgery: June 23-29

I get really grumpy when I can’t exercise (yes, I’m that person), and this was no exception. The pain was (and is) horrendous at times, and sleeping propped up like a toy doll definitely took some getting used to. My appetite became non-existent due to the sheer amount of drugs I was taking and stress my body had been under, and I grew an immediate hatred for having to do anything with only one arm. Like type. Typing is the worst.  On the plus side, my sling is adorable thanks to patches from Ban.do, but the huge white bandage tends to get people’s attention first. Also, shoutout to Hannah for surprising me with a stuffed animal to come home to, because OMG HOW ADORABLE ARE HIS EYES I CAN’T BEST CUDDLE BUDDY EVER.

Oh, I found out that work is nearly impossible the hard way, and ended up making a total fool of myself by overdoing it and almost breaking down in tears on the floor. Whoops! Well, you live and you learn. Huge thanks to my boyfriend and parents for keeping me sane and being patient with me because guess what? Carrying things with one arm is kind of terrible and little Miss Independent has had to learn to ask for help. Sigh.

Post-Op: June 29

And finally, the post-op. Let’s just be honest, shall we? I’m PMSing and in a ton of pain, plus my cat had woken me up three times in the night by pouncing on my feet so to say I was sleepy and grumpy was an understatement. ANY-WAY, my doctor told me that things had gone swimmingly and that my original break had literally not healed at all. Nothing was blocking it, it just didn’t heal. Weird, right? Even he was perplexed. But I saw a video he took of my bones moving during the surgery and aside from being scarred for life, it was oddly fascinating..not fascinating enough to ever watch it again though. The plate and six screws are here to stay, and I get to start physical therapy early, which is wonderful news since this sling and I are just not getting along. My white plaster bandage is off, and while I may look like Frankenstein’s monster, it could be worse!

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Now if only I could figure out how to get the bandage adhesive off of my skin….
Until next time,
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